I’m a lobster and so are you

You are a lobster in a pot full of cool tap water.  The question is: Is the water still cold?  Because you’re still the lobster.  And you’re still in that cookware, we know this much is true.  But has anyone ignited the gas below?  Has the flame started licking the bottom of the pot? I … Continue reading I’m a lobster and so are you

A day in the life of an abandoned ping-pong ball

I’m writing this blog post at my internship.  I’m probably not supposed to, but I’ve decided to take a lunch break and write anyways, because the more time there is in between posts, the more anxiety I have. Also, I’m bored and there’s really no work for me to do.  But I signed a contract … Continue reading A day in the life of an abandoned ping-pong ball

Why I’m afraid of the gym: A string of horror stories

One day at recess when I was in the third grade, a girl named Sydney materialized in front of me, yelled, “Think fast!” and promptly launched a soccer ball at my face and succeeded in hitting all of it.  My equally unpopular friend Andy as my witness, this happened. Coincidentally, I have been hit dead … Continue reading Why I’m afraid of the gym: A string of horror stories