I am a spacey human being. I spend an enormous amount of my time daydreaming; but I’m not alone. A Harvard study found that your average person spends roughly half of their waking hours with their head in the clouds (BBC), off to exotic lands and seeking forbidden love. It’s almost like there’s an alternative reality in our mind’s eye, beckoning us to come closer, to view ourselves in a fantasy land of our own invention.
Basically, to imagine ourselves, but more interesting. Well, at least that’s my take. I stress about how other people respond to what I have to say. What do my friends think of me? My family? Random people at social gatherings? Do they find me interesting or dull? Lively or boring?
I mean, let’s face it. I would be much more interesting if I were the lead singer/guitarist in an all-girl rock band. Or maybe if I wrote an award winning novel, or starred in an Academy nominated film.
In junior high, I used to daydream about being a journalist in a zombie-ridden North America, communicating with Europe digitally to document daily life in a vacant, crumbling New York.
I mean, I’ve never even been to New York. And with my luck, I’d be patient zero in the event of a zombie apocalypse.
But in my daydream I can be one of the last survivors, one of the lucky ones, one of the interesting ones.
I’m not sure why being interesting to other people is so damn important. Mostly, I don’t really mind other people and their excessive commentary or opinions about me; it’s none of my business. But in the competition to be worldly, talented, and educated, I’m constantly worried about falling behind.
It’s interesting- we live in a vast and endlessly fascinating universe, chock full of books and music and instruments and art and blank word documents and eclectic, hipster blogs. Still, somehow we find boredom. Somehow we find restlessness. Most of the time, my life feels like a never ending cycle of Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, and Snapchat. Social media forces me to live in an echo chamber of my friends and family, and it doesn’t entertain me. It only distracts me just enough to forget to peek my head above the surface. It’s enough to make me forget to explore the world. And it’s important enough to me to keep all my accounts, to check them every time I get a chance, to respond to notifications with a sense of dire urgency. Walking away from social media is walking away from the loop.
But it also makes me more boring. It makes me one of everybody else. And my own head seems like my only escape. Maybe I should delete a few of my accounts and use the extra time to read more books or to blog or plan a cool vacation or do anything else. Or I could just stop worrying about being boring and use my time to do what I love.
What do you think? Do you daydream the day away? Would you survive a zombie apocalypse? Are you interesting? Comment and let me know or whatever.